Beijing according to Sophie

The thick layer of smog that hung over Beijing and clung to my skin was magnified in contrast to the seemingly fresh mountain air on the Great Wall. As mentioned previously, seeing stars or blue skies can be rare occasions in certain parts of China, so when we do have that lucky bright day or clear night, we tend to appreciate it so much more. Perhaps, therefore, my perception of Beijing has been polluted by the fact that the weather was cold and drizzly and the sky remained a very particular brand of carbon coloured grey.

My friend Erik had given me his much tested ‘Beijing itinerary’ and we booked a night at a hostel on his recommendation. Our hostel was wonderful with a relaxed atmosphere; the décor was simple yet beautiful, a particular highlight being an inner courtyard that is common in traditional Northern Chinese houses. Erik had done well. The hostel was situated a close walk to Tiananmen Square and was surrounded by small roads and alleys, home to a variety of markets selling a myriad of goods; flashing bright lights and red Chinese lanterns adorned almost every doorway and window display. In China you can usually tell the seedy level of an alley as measured by the seedy-o-meter: The more pink, florescent lights, the better it’s left unexplored, (unless, of course, your expedition has a wholly different goal).

Alex and I decided not to allow the rain to destroy our Dora the explorer spirits and planned to explore Beijing by night after having a quick shower, (during which I managed to flood the whole bathroom-this is something I have successfully achieved in several countries now…perhaps there is a book in there somewhere).

Within the first hour of our Beijing exploration we had noticed two things: 1. Beijing people are friendly (Ok, so they were trying to sell us stuff but they were friendly none the less) and 2. Getting a taxi in Beijing is a mission worthy of James Bond. Alex: What does he mean he wants 80 yuan? It cost us 10 yuan to get here, he’s having a laugh!! He was indeed having a laugh…he and his quasi-taxi-driver-friends laughed us right down the street.

Our main goal for the first evening was to get as many odd, fried creatures into Alex’s gob as possible. Well, I say ‘our goal’ but really it was Alex whose heart was set solidly on munching down some scorpions. It didn’t take us long to find the night markets; Erik told us exactly where to go and plus, Beijing seems to give the illusion of being really quite small.

I couldn't catch the movement on camera

The night markets are truly fabulous, with a special kind of vibrancy which one only finds in amongst the hustle and bustle of a market place. You can find the same energy in Camden town or in amongst the souks in Marrakesh: it is exciting and intoxicating. This atmosphere was made more incredible by the foreign-ness of the whole affair…like this was absolutely nothing like anywhere else in the world. Bright fairy lights hung in clusters above, putting stars into the Beijing night and lanterns and brightly coloured silks hung over stall after stall.  In and amongst the usual tourist tat and bizarre gift ideas (you can get a model doll made to look exactly like yourself- the definition of freaky-cool), were what we were looking for. Oh what choice, a banquet so splendid that Henry the eighth would tremble with jealousy (interesting side note: the Chinese for jealousy is ‘Chi1 Cu4’ which translates literally to ‘eat vinegar’). Displayed on sticks across counters and counters were a variety of insect and arachnid-the baby scorpions were still alive and moving on the sticks. Alex: I’m going to do it.  Me: You’re a bigger man than I! Oh god…ew! I can’t believe you’re actually eating that. What does it taste like? Alex: Fried bones mainly. Me: Tasty. Let me try a pincer…

Alex with the babies

There. There you have it. My one and only culinary experimentation was a tiny, almost none existent baby scorpion pincer. Alex on the other hand gobbled down all four scorpions and then…he…went…looking for MORE!! I have to say, I am continuously impressed by Alex’s experimental streak; it was around about the second stick of scorpions that me, the stall owner to my left and the random Chinese guy standing behind us started to get a bit nauseous. This time Alex upgraded from baby to daddy scorpion and the only way of eating such a beast, still encased in its very effective armour, is to suck out its wobbly bits.

Daddy scorpion actually not a deeeelish as it looks

 We moved on from the pedestrian street and soon found a whole row of food stalls selling ONLY strange creatures. You know, the kind that usually live in dirt or grass or trees; the kind of creatures which are too exotic to share my nationality. There were bee cocoons, fried birds’ nests, star fish, silk worms, baby sharks, dog stew, cat fillet, locust sticks and centipedes, as well as a selection of other delicacies. It makes sense to me, eating creatures that are in high supply which cost nothing but seeing them all laid out like that, I had to wonder how many actually got sold and what they did with the leftovers. Me: Hey, Alex. Dare you to eat a sheep’s penis. Alex: I don’t want to be the guy who ate penis. Me: Go on, it’ll be funny!!

            *** Some time later *** Alex: I think have some stuck in my teeth.

            *** Even later than that *** Alex: I think it went really far in. It kind of hurts.

Aaaaaand cue one of the all-time funniest moments of my life. I’m sorry Alexiho…I love you but this situation…well, this needs to be immortalised, dear friend.

After a very enjoyable and unforgettable day of climbing the Great Wall followed by a trip to Beijing’s night markets and the ingestion of some interesting, freaky creatures (and their appendages), Alex and I hit the hay.

This is NOT a joke

Our final day in Beijing began early and with enthusiasm. After breakfast we headed off to Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. Once we arrived we spent quite a long time trying to figure out where exactly Tiananmen Square was…as we stood, in the middle of it! Ho hum…into the not-so-Forbidden-City we traipsed, accompanied by a large crowd of eager tourists with cameras at the ready. Oh, there was Mao’s face over the gate of heavenly peace, very interesting, oh and there goes that toy solider crawling across the courtyard holding the Chinese flag. Me: Are we in the Forbidden City yet? How are we supposed to know? We found out that we were entering when they made us pay- this is always a good indication of when you have arrived somewhere important. Alex and I celebrated our discovery with a series of strangely posed pictures in front of one of many identical buildings.

Being classy in the Forbidden City

Perhaps I will be cursed by the ghosts of traditions past or the spirits of architecture appreciation and I’m not saying that the cultural and architectural importance of the Forbidden City isn’t without extreme and relevant weight. However, I will say that although beautiful and ornate, the Forbidden City is like being stuck in a Chinese hall of mirrors…everything is repeated over and over again. What is initially impressive becomes a very recent memory repeating itself. Perhaps this is crude and for that I am sorry, but really, it’s the truth. Perhaps this was emphasised by the rain and the grey skies- I tend to be effected by the weather.

Before we left for the train station we also went to the Olympic village and moseyed around. It’s a very impressive, futuristic structure, although I’m not sure what they do with it now. The whole area seemed more or less deserted apart from the tourists and usual tat sellers and both of the metro stations joining the area to the main town were closed. We had lunch in Beijing’s answer to Soho or the South bank- unusual, slightly eccentric boutiques, cafes and restaurants lined a pebbled street, which we discovered completely by mistake but which was a definite city highlight, for me at least.

All in all, although Beijing isn’t my favourite city in China or indeed the great wide world, it was a fantastic trip. Staying at and then climbing the Great Wall was a highlight of my life and travelling with such a dear and funny friend as Alex made the experience all the more enjoyable. Beijing was a city of firsts but for me, it is also a city of lasts and that makes it a very special place indeed.